We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. – 2 Corinthians 10:5
Greetings:
During our first hour last week, we wrapped up the discussion of Topic #5: “Control Issues.”
Are you a “Robot,” or a “Commander” – ? And what do you propose to do about it, in either case?
Remember: Self-discipline and self-control are the hallmarks of a mature adult and the raw material from which healthy marriages are built.
For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age… – Titus 2:11-12
Take Control of Yourself
1. Be responsible for all of your own emotions and happiness.
2. Love people unconditionally no matter how they treat you.
3. Focus on your reactions, not others or your external circumstances.
– From THE DNA of RELATIONSHIPS, by Dr. Gary Smalley
…………………..
My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.
If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless. – James 1:19-20, 26
During the 2nd Hour last Monday, we began Topic #6: “Listening Beyond the Words,” with an emphasis on “Reflective Listening.”
Among the items covered were “Why We Stop Listening to Our Spouse,” the “Tricks We Use to Avoid Listening,” and the “Problems of Scrambling and Static.” (The Worksheet & Notes for Topic 6 are attached)
Your HOMEWORK for this week – from the Topic #6 Worksheet:
– Practice “Reflective Listening” with your spouse.
– Reflect on YOUR Listening Skills; and
– “Ponder” in what ways your “manner of communication” might be hindering conversation with your spouse.
The discussion of “Listening” will wrap up during our first hour this Monday, then we will move on to Topic #7: Personality Differences.
(Note that we will re-visit Communication in a few weeks with the topic of “Speaking!”)
(Hint for Monday: You might see an exercise on Reflective Listening pop up – so a bit of practice over the weekend seems a good idea…)
The Holy Spirit spoke the truth to your ancestors when he said through Isaiah the prophet:
Go to this people and say,
You will be ever hearing but never understanding;
you will be ever seeing but never perceiving.
For this people’s heart has become calloused;
they hardly hear with their ears,
and they have closed their eyes.
Otherwise they might see with their eyes,
hear with their ears,
understand with their hearts
and turn, and I would heal them.
– Acts 28:25-27
………………………….
As always, we look forward to seeing everyone on Monday evening.
Go with God –
Reid, Marilyn, & the Marriage Builders Team
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. – Ephesians 4:32